Spock  Chocolate  Awesome!
by CaptainInsaneD
Summary: What happens when Spock finds Kirks hidden stash of chocolate? Pure crack! Uhura bashing, rating may go up due to language.
1. Scotty!

**Spock + Chocolate = Awesome! **

_This is a random story that me and Random523 came up with one night. For those that read Welcome To The Future, sorry but I'm in a miner writers block, but should be over it soon! Anyway, enjoy and I do not own Star Trek._

**Chapter 1: Scotty!**

"Dammit, Keenser! Get back here and gimme back mah wrench!" Scotty screamed, running down the stairs into the main engine room. He passed by a few Engineers, who ignored the outraged Scotsman. Scotty stopped when he heard snickering. An evil smile split his face as he got closer to the laughing.

He listened closely and realized that the laughing was getting closer. Turning the corner, expecting to see the small green man/ thing, but ran into a smiling Spock.

"Agh! Commander, ya scurred mah. 'Ave ya seen Keenser?" Scotty asked the swaying Vulcan. Scotty nearly crapped his pants when Spock _giggled_ and said, "You talk funny…Almost like a song the Captain made me listen to…."

Scotty's eyes widen at the slurred speech, but his eyes nearly fell out of his head when Spock started to sing….

_Oh, he doesn't smell like Irish Spring, And he never taught me anything, But still I slap my chest and sing - Of My Drunken Irish Dad. _

"I'm not your dad…" Scotty mumbled and let out a manly squeal when Spock grabbed his shoulder and continued singing…

_Oh, his face looks like a railroad map, And he never shuts his freakin' trap... _

"Hey! Now dats jus' rude!" Scotty yelled at the crazed First Officer. Spock ignored him and let go of Scotty's shoulder and made his way out of Engineering, leaving a trail of Engineers and Ensigns in a stat of confusion and shock.

_The next chapter should be up by tomorrow… Please review!_


	2. Uhura!

_Ok, before this chapter begins, I have to say I'm sorry to all Uhura's fans…I really don't like Uhura, at all. I mean she's mean as hell! Anyway, enjoy and I don't own Star Trek! And sorry for it being so late!_

**Chapter 2: Uhura!**

Reading a PADD that the Captain gave her, Uhura mad her way down to the mess hall.

She was mumbling and cursing Kirk under her breath about making her work when she

heard and Ensign shouting, "I'm not joking guys! He was singing and dancing all around!

Hell, he grabbed CEO Scott by the shoulders and called him his 'drunken Irish dad'!"

She walked into the Mess and saw the Ensign sitting with other Red Shirts. His face was as red as his shirt at the moment. She felt pity for the poor man and walked over.

"Who are you talking about?" She asked, trying to remember the Ensigns name.

"He claims to have seen Commander Spock singing and dancing down in Engineering,

But I think he just had to long of a day in the engine room." Another Ensign said rolling

his eyes at Ensign 1.

Uhura's eyes widened at this, but before she could say a word, someone singing made the

words die on her lips.

As the singing got louder and more off-key, the more Ensign 1 tensed in fear. Uhura looked toward the door, expecting to see and drunk Kirk, but in walks Spock.

Her eyes widened at his green flushed face and the face-splitting smile as he stumbled across the room, over to the table of Ensigns and her.

"Uhura!" She jumped as Spock basically screamed in her ear. "It's good ta see ya!"

"Spock, are you alright?" She asked the still dancing half-Vulcan.

Spock nodded vigorously, then stopped abruptly and looked at Uhura with his normal serious look.

"Lt. I have some things I must speak with you about." The seemingly normal half-Vulcan said.

"Yes? What is it?" She asked, hopes raising. Four weeks ago Spock and her broke up because he said that they were not compatible. Maybe he wanted her back!(A/N: Fat chance at that…)

Spock took a deep breath and started to sing…

_Well, Uhura's a bitch, she's a big fat bitch, she's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, _

Uhura eyes started to water, as Spock continued to sing about her.

_she's a stupid bitch,if there ever was a bitch,she's a bitch to all the boys and girls._

She finally let the tears fall down her cheeks, as she turned and ran out of the room.

The Ensigns stared at Spock in shock as he turned on his heel(with some difficulty) and stumbled his way out of the room.

"I told you that the Commander lost his freaking mind…" Ensign 1 mumbled to the other Red Shirts.

_Well, that was fun to write. Again to all those who like Uhura, sorry. I hope ya'll enjoyed it and please review! Next up Chekov! _


End file.
